License Plates

When did this explosion of customized vehicular license plates begin? You used to be able to tell from a great distance whether the car that cut you off on the Deegan was from New York, New Jersey or wherever. But these days you need an engineer's schematic diagram to figure which plate belongs to which state.

Here in New York we now have some 27 versions of the New York State plate such as the traditional "empire state" version and including all sports franchises from Long Island to Buffalo. I shouldn't fail to mention that "save the roadkill" and "eat more clams" are catching on in popularity. But perhaps the most ridiculous plate is from New Hampshire, expanding upon this silly practice of kitschy licenses...

Florida has, among many, "Save the Manatees," Kentucky has an outline of their state (coincidentally the same shape as a KFC fried chicken leg), Arizona's got a desert and cacti theme and New Jersey's got former Governor Whitman patting down an African American perp.

What's next? Who knows. Perhaps corporate sponsorship? Imagine...

• CONNECTICUT
• XYZ - 123
• brought to you by
• Priceline.com

My idea...well I'm not particularly into sports or saving animals. I'll need a different hobby displayed...

• NEW YORK
• ABC-123
• watch more porn.